I’ve worked as a writing coach with INFJ and INFP writers for over seven years now, and I continue to see the same blocks over and over. Every time a writer comes to me with issues around feeling like they can’t get started, they can’t stick with one thing, they can’t follow through with something until the end, we peel back the layers and I always find the same myths about writing and creating—the exact same limiting beliefs—over and over again.
There’s a whole list of these damaging myths that run rampant through the mind of a struggling INFJ or INFP writer, but there is one I hear about more than any other. This myth is so insidious, and it undermines our creative efforts so effectively, because, on the surface, it sounds so reasonable. It seems so sensible and logical that it’s really, really hard for the INFJ or INFP writer to call bullshit on it. And as you read it here, you may even find yourself agreeing with it:
I have to know whether or not my idea has any marketable value before I begin.
Now, although it might sound like a reasonable statement, this is actually a limiting belief. Number one, because it’s wrong. Even if you come up with an idea and you are one hundred percent sure it will sell, you won’t honestly know until you test it on the market (i.e., your audience), and then you might find out, to your surprise, that it’s actually not something that sells. Number two, it’s false. The whole point of creating art or engaging deeply with the writing process is self-expression and connection with others, and this has nothing to do with money.
But the big one is number three, because it is actually dangerous for INFJ and INFP writers.
Accepting this myth as truth is dangerous because so many INFJ and INFP writers grew up with a narcissistic parent, or within a narcissistic family dynamic, and when you’re raised by narcissists, you are trained to focus on how things look, NOT on how they feel, which is where this whole “I have to know the marketable value” belief originates. And when we buy into it, we stay firmly rooted in the toxic dysfunction of our narcissistic family patterns. I talk more about this in depth in my third and final video in the series I’m doing on perfectionism and procrastination as part of the launch for my new live class in August called YOU Are a Writer: Getting Past the Fear and Finally Moving Forward. You can find the video here:
I’m opening registration for the class on Wednesday and you’ll have five days to register if you want to be part of the class. After that, the window closes and I can’t allow any late-comers as it wouldn’t be fair to everyone else. So, if you know you want in, get in while you can, because when that window closes it’s over.
And if you want to make sure you get all the updates sign up for my mailing list HERE. If you have questions, please contact me HERE, and please don’t hold back. Send me your questions, big or small! I’d love to get them answered and get the people who really need to be in this class, in it. This is going to be a game-changer for a lot of people in the way they relate to their writing, and their lives, so I want to make sure we don’t miss one single person who is supposed to be on the journey with us.
I’ll see you Wednesday! Woo-hoo!
Lauren Sapala is the author of The INFJ Writer and The INFJ Revolution. She is also currently offering a free copy of her book on creative marketing for INFJ and INFP writers to anyone who signs up for her newsletter. SIGN UP HERE to get your free copy of Firefly Magic: Heart Powered Marketing for Highly Sensitive Writers.