1. Our opinion is determined by all the different sides we can see on an issue. This doesn’t mean we don’t have an opinion. It means that our opinion changes depending on what side we are looking at.
This makes us feel that, while we striving for fairness, others see us as not fully committed or flaky.
2. We very quickly can understand the deeper layers of anyone we meet. However, very few other people can understand our deeper layers—or even try.
This makes us well-aware of the fact that, while other people feel seen by us, we just feel lonely.
3. We are deep thinkers, not fast talkers. By the time we’ve formulated what we want to say, the other party has moved on.
This leaves us feeling unheard, and the other person is completely oblivious.
4. We have intense feelings but we don’t usually talk about them. Other people routinely remark on how quiet we are, or sometimes don’t even seem to see us at all.
This makes us feel that other people are seeing us as something we are not, but we also feel powerless to correct their perception.
5. We form soul connections in romantic relationships, even if the relationship is brief. If these relationships end, it takes us much longer than the average person to heal and move on. Other people often don’t understand this and question why it’s so hard for us to “get over it.”
This makes us feel like something is wrong with the way we attach to people, and also unable to share our experiences with others.
6. We get insights and information through inner images and feelings, most of which are non-verbal. It’s difficult to translate our hunches and intuitive sensations to other people in a logical way and so many people ignore our precognitive ability.
This puts us in the position of making us feel like the prophet whose prophecies are never believed.
7. Living a meaningful life is more important to us than making money or gaining status or societal approval. This is in direct opposition to the way the majority of the population approaches life.
This highlights how our values clash with the mainstream, and can make us question our truth and purpose for living.
8. Even when we are very angry or upset with someone, we still consider their feelings and endeavor not to cause them any harm. Although we know it takes great amounts of inner strength to restrain ourselves in these types of situations, we are also aware that others often judge us as “weak” or a “pushover” because they think we’re not standing up for ourselves.
This makes us feel like our form of strength is dismissed by others and judged as a flaw.
I teach a new class for INFJs and INFPs every month where we cover topics like these and more for INF people. To get all the updates about new classes and workshops, be sure to sign up for my newsletter here.