Why INFJs Have So Much Anxiety and Depression

Being an INFJ personality type comes with many gifts, but it can also feel like it comes with many burdens at the same time. In addition to being highly sensitive (sometimes to an extreme degree), many INFJs also struggle with high amounts of anxiety and depression.

A lot of INFJs report that they experience a low-key depression running in the background of their lives, even when it appears that everything is going well on the surface. In fact, what might be the most frustrating to INFJs about the way they experience anxiety and depression is that it can be very difficult to pinpoint exactly what it is that is causing them to feel this way. So, they then feel guilty for even feeling anxious or depressed, because in their mind they have “no good reason” to feel that way. Continue Reading

Why It’s So Lonely Being an INFJ

If you are an INFJ personality type then you have definitely experienced the loneliness of being an INFJ, because while INFJs easily understand the psychological landscape of those around them, they are typically misunderstood themselves. Added to this is the fact that most INFJs have trust issues and it’s difficult for us to open up to people and share our real selves.

This results in INFJs feeling lonely and isolated, and also internalizing this loneliness as a belief that something is wrong with us. Deep down, most INFJs feel that they are defective in some way, and that if they were ever to show the world their true self, they would be rejected for being too weird, too sensitive, or just not normal. Continue Reading

How Do I Get Over the Fear of Starting?

For writers, starting is definitely the hardest part. It’s common for writers to dream about writing their book—and holding their finished book in their hands—for months, or even years. However, when it comes time to sit down at the desk and write those first few sentences, more often than not, that’s when we experience total fear and paralysis.

Why does this happen to writers? Continue Reading

Why Is It So Lonely Being a Writer?

It’s no surprise that many writers feel misunderstood and alone. Writing, after all, is mostly a solitary pursuit. Whenever we visualize a writer hard at work, we tend to think of a person sitting all by themselves in an empty room, typing away. While this is sometimes true, that doesn’t mean that writers like being lonely or that we don’t long for connection or community.

It’s not only the solitary nature of writing that makes writers lonely. It’s also that most writers are introverts. We tend to be naturally introspective, and some of us even suffer from social anxiety. Groups and group activities can be hard for us, and even though we have a lot to say on the page, making conversation in real life isn’t always easy.

I talk more about writers and why we’re so lonely in the video below: Continue Reading

5 Hidden Benefits of Being an INFJ Writer

One of my students asked me the other day about the positives of being an INFJ writer. The question made me stop and think because I realized that, although we talk a lot about the struggles of being an INFJ writer, rarely do we pause to appreciate the gifts. And there are plenty of gifts, that’s for certain. So today I’m taking a little time to remind all the INFJ writers out there (as well as myself) why it’s great to be an INFJ writer. Continue Reading